We just received Jason Upton's new CD - Glimpse.
This CD is great but one song stands out the most, it's called Table.
I'll try to post the lyrics to it later.
Listen close. One line says, "We don't forgive because people deserve it. We forgive so we can see again."
It's been awhile since I've written much. Everytime I sit down to write, my mind goes blank. So this was my post on facebook earlier, "I just heard this song for the first time and it's the cry of my heart right now. I'm so tired of "stuff". I feel my heart getting dull. I recently told Bobby to quit his job so we can sell everything and just go, be free, move wherever. Sigh.. but this is the season to "fight the good fight" (1 Tim 6:12), dig in and reject the stuff of this world. "Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom" 1Cor 3:17"
"You wrote a letter and You signed Your name I read every word of it page by page You said You'd be coming, coming for me soon O my God, I'll be ready for you"
Today while chatting online with a friend I realized how frustrated and agitated I am, but could not point those emotions to a specific something. Later I sat downstairs and hooked up our old mostly broken and missing buttons laptop to the prayer room. I had it sitting close to the floor and some child or some dog changed the screen from live to the archives. Since it was changed I clicked Misty Edwards. I found her set was very encouraging for my tension. I transcribed the part that was particularly encouraging to me (I may not have written everything 100% accurate but keep in mind loud children and a dog who thought it was playtime were interfering)
Misty Edwards 2/7/11 6pm
I know there's more than this (x3) And I want it
There are moments I get angry at my boredom And there are times when I get frustrated at my lethargy And there are times when I look up to heaven and just get frustrated at the ceiling. And I just can't seem to get through But when I draw back and realize that hunger is my gift That hunger is my gift
O, there are times I look up to heaven in frustration I feel like I'm in a fog It's like I'm hungry I'm thirsty And I'm wrestling and fighting the ceiling And I just can't break in or break through
Then I hear a whisper in my spirit He says again 'Blessed are you. Blessed are you because you can't stand to be stagnant You can't stand to stay in one place Disillusionment will not be your friend I will answer you from glory to glory I will answer you from strength to strength
You've got to keep on keep on keep on knocking You've got to keep on keep on keep on seeking You've got to keep on keep on keep on believing Again and Again and Again
Let your frustration be your fuel Let your agitation be like a holy spirit violence You're not gonna stay here forever Let the dullness drive you Just don't give up
Blessed are the frustrated who just won't stay stagnant Blessed are those who refuse to accept the way things are'
Wow! Thank you Lord for speaking to my soul! I ask that others would be encouraged as they read this and allow them to know they have the same hunger in them, for you gave it to them. Open their eyes to see they are Your favorite one, that You delight and sing over them. Bless them in Jesus name!
The battle is raging
The devil is raging
I dont want to be sleeping
While the battle is raging
For my spirit is willing
But my flesh gets tempted
Rise up, my soul, and start praying
Cause I dont want to be defenseless, yeah
I dont fight as one who beats the air
Give me eyes to see and ears to hear
I put on Christ, make no provision for my flesh
Put on the whole armor of God
Leave no open door to darkness
And I take the scroll, I eat the scroll
I open up my mouth and speak forth Your word
And I take the sword of the Spirit
Blessed be the Lord my Rock
Who trains my hands for battle, who trains my hands for war
You're beautiful - Phil Wickham I see Your face in every sunrise The colors of the morning are inside Your eyes The world awakens in the light of the day I look up to the sky and say You're beautiful
I see Your power in the moonlit night Where planets are in motion and galaxies are bright We are amazed in the light of the stars It's all proclaiming who You are You're beautiful, You're beautiful
I see you there hanging on a tree You bled and then you died and then you rose again for me Now you are sitting on Your heavenly throne Soon we will be coming home You're beautiful, you're beautiful
When we arrive at eternity's shore Where death is just a memory and tears are no more We'll enter in as the wedding bells ring Your bride will come together and we'll sing You're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful
I see Your face, You're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful I see Your face, You're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful I see Your face, I see Your face I see Your face, You're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful
You won't relent Until You have it all My heart is Yours
I'll set You as a seal upon my heart As a seal upon my arm For there is love that is as strong as death Jealousy demanding as the grave And many waters cannot quench this love
Come be the fire inside of me Come be the flame upon my heart Come be the fire inside of me Until You and I are one
Lou Engle had a message on songs breaking the bonds of dryness or dullness in our lives, I can't remember his actual quote but if I do I'll post it. When he said his statement on music I agreed with him, music is really speaking to my heart right now. I wrote earlier about my frustration on hypocrisy and "Christians", always checking my heart first, and thought what I had written was inconclusive. We all have our own struggles some apparent and some hidden. There is hope though. The Lord wants us to live in freedom and joy but we continually trap ourselves. We continually fall for the snares set out in front of us because our vision is limited and we are selfish. The Lord is calling us back to Him. Accept His call and He'll bring you the freedom you are desiring.
Here are two more songs that have been on repeat in my mind:
There's a gap - Laura Hackett
"What do I do here in the waiting? What do I do with my unsatisfied heart? What do I do here in the waiting, here in the tension of believing again and again and again
Chorus There's a lack there's a gap in my soul Between the things that I believe and I know (x2)
Holy Spirit you who fill, all in all, come and fill me Holy Spirit come hold me together.
I fall into grace again. Yes, I fall into grace again like the child I am"
Put on Christ - Laura Hackett
"Jesus Christ who gave himself for our sins That He might deliver us from this present evil age
For the battle is raging, the Devil is raging I don't want to be sleeping for the battle is raging
For my spirit is willing but my flesh gets tempted Rise up my soul and start praying Because I don't want to be defenseless
I don't fight as one who beats the air Give me eyes to see and ears to hear (x3)
I put on Christ make no provision for my flesh I put on the whole armor of God Leave no open door to darkness And I take the scroll I eat the scroll I open up my mouth and speak forth your Word And I take the sword of the Spirit
Blessed be the Lord my rock He trains my hands for battle He trains my hands for war (x4)
I don't fight as one who beats the air I have eyes to see and ears to hear (x2)
It doesn't have to be a blind battle Because I have the mind of Christ"
"Who can understand his errors? Cleanse me from secret faults. Keep back your servant also from presumptuous sins; Let them not have dominion over me. Then I shall be blameless, and I shall be innocent of great transgression" Psalm 19:12-13 .
"In that day the kingdom of heaven will be liken unto 10 virgins.
In that day all of them were waiting for the bridegroom.
All of them were waiting and waiting and waiting.
All of them have lamps and were waiting, waiting, waiting...
In the mundane, mundane, mundane
When the night falls they fall asleep
Each and everyone of them they fall asleep
In the mundane, mundane, mundane
Waiting, waiting, waiting for the bridegroom
And they fell asleep
In the night hour a cry will be heard
In the midnight hour
In the deepest darkest hour of history
For behold a deep deep darkness will cover the earth
In the midnight hour of history
It will be the darkest hour of history
Deep deep darkness will cover the earth
Like a dark dark darkness will clothe the land
For in the midnight hour a cry will be heard
And the 10 virgins will awake from their slumber
They'll be scurrying around their ministries
They'll be shining their lamps going out to meet Him
It's the day they've been waiting for
The wedding is just around the corner
They'll be running around scurrying around
Getting ready to go out finally
But in that day says the Lord
The kingdom will be just like this
And in that day five will be wise
And five will be foolish
Wisdom and folly defined by the Master
For the foolish so busy shining their lamps forgot to get the oil
And the clock is now ticking and it's the middle of the night
And the cry has been resounded
The foolish are trying so hard to get their lamps lit but they have no oil
So preoccupied, so preoccupied
They've been building a ministry, planning and scheming
And in all of the things they've forgotten reality, relationship
They forgot to get the oil for the inside of the lamp.
For the oil comes from the inside out and they forgot it.
Like empty tombs they forgot it
The five who were wise they had oil
For even though they slept their hearts were awake
They didn't get weighed down by the mundane
Or distracted by the lamps
They had the first things first
They had the oil from the inside out
And the five that were foolish will say to the five who were wise in that day
"Oh help us, help us. Give us some of your reality. Give us some of your intimacy. Give us some of your oil in your lamp"
But it doesn't work that way. It can't work that way.
And the five that were wise will say to the foolish, "Go buy oil for yourself, You have to take the time to know Him for yourself"
They say,"Go buy oil. I council you to buy it now. Go buy oil I cannot give it to you. You have to go buy oil for yourself. I cannot give you mine for only what is real will burn on the inside."
In that day the five that were wise will go to meet the bridegroom in the feast of the wedding
Oh but the five that were foolish -will cry
So I tell you now while there's still time
Go buy oil before it's too late I council you
Now you have a name but you're dead on the inside
So I warn you now
I council you buy gold refined in the fire
For you have a lamp that's your alive but you're dead on the inside
But there's still time just a little bit only a little bit
What are you going to do with that time?
Time is ticking by and the bridegroom is coming are you ready to meet Him?
Will you even recognize Him?
So I tell you now go buy oil
I council you buy gold refined in the fire
Take the time to live from the inside out
Take the time to be acquainted with the Holy Spirit and the Word
Take the time to buy oil before it's too late
"Your presence is all I’m longing for here in the secret place Your nearness is all I’m waiting for here in the quiet place, here in the secret place
My soul waits for you alone Like the watchmen wait for dawn Here I’ve finally found the place Where we’ll meet, Lord, face to face
I’ve finally found where I belong, I’ve finally found where I belong, In Your presence I’ve finally found where I belong, to be with You, to be with You
I am my Beloved’s and He is mine, so come into Your garden and take delight in me Take delight in me (x2)
Delight in me, Delight in me Delight in me, Delight in me
Here in Your presence, God, I find my rest Here in Your presence, God. !"
Nothing else in this world can or will satisfy us. Turn your gaze above!
"I felt the pain of compromise Deep in sin I've know the tension of a heart that's divided
I've tasted and I've seen YOUR good and now I am Ruined for less than all YOU have for me
The more I see of all this world The more I am convinced I'm called to be a stranger to all it's ways So do not hide YOUR laws from me For I know they are my doorway for eternity
I want to live a life that's worthy of YOUR calling Remove from me the thing's that are hinderin' me from loving YOU Because I don't want regret upon the day I stand before YOU May I be found a pure and spotless bride ready for YOUR king."
Last night we were watching the live webstream from the International House of Prayer in Kansas City. There was a girl who was delivered from Self-hatred and eating disorders caused by a man who attempted to rape her when she was 15. The years of shame were dissolved in a moment. She felt the joy of the Lord come upon her and agreed with all His promises. That she is the one who the Lord delights in, she is beautiful, that her life matters, etc.
Then Misty Edwards sang this song:
Your love is stronger than temptation Stronger than my shame Your love is stronger than my sin Your Love Wins
The waters of temptation cannot quench this love The waters of condemnation cannot quench this love
Your Love Wins
The Lord God Almighty, the creator of our souls is in love with us! He is beckoning and calling us into this love relationship. His desire is for us! He wants to hear your voice "Let me see your face, Let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet and your face is lovely." (Sos 2:14)
If you are longing for something more I encourage you to seek the One who created you "For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother's womb. I will praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, and skillfully wrougth in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them." (Psalm 139:13-16)
If you don't know how to seek God, watch the live webstream at http://www.ihop.org/ click the link at the top of the main page after 6pm.
